When I Finally Had Everything, I Learned What Happiness Truly Is.

The Meaning of Happiness
There was a time when I thought I already knew what happiness was.

As a child, happiness meant playing with friends and passing my exams. In high school, it was being liked by the person you admired or finding true friendship. In college, it became selflessness—serving others and choosing goodness. When I got married, happiness was loving and being loved, building a family, and raising children. Later, it became achievement—reaching goals, experiencing success, and celebrating milestones.

And then… I reached that moment. I had a family. A good career. Financial stability. See the world.
Our dream home. Finished my studies. Found the right circles. Developed people. Time flexibility. Good health.

Everything I once prayed for was already in my hands. And in that moment, I also realized— God had been with me through it all. Every answered prayer, every opportunity, every breakthrough— they were never just my own doing.

And yet, there came a quiet moment where I felt something unexpected— a sense of emptiness… even loneliness. Not because something was missing, but because everything had already been given. I realized happiness changes. And more importantly, happiness is not a destination.

Happiness is a daily creation.
It is something we choose to create, learn to recognize, and humbly receive—every single day. Today, I wake up happy simply because I am alive. Because I am surrounded by the people and little creatures I love. Because I am given another chance to do good.
This kind of happiness is quieter, deeper, and more powerful.
It does not wait for everything to be perfect. It gently exists—even in our refining moments.


How I Now Choose Happiness.

These are the anchors that now shape my happiness—the deeper meaning I’ve come to understand, and my quiet answer to the question I’m often asked:
Nyla, where do you get your energy? How are you always so full of life?


1. Strong Relationships

The Harvard Study of Adult Development shows that strong relationships are the most consistent predictor of happiness and long life. I used to believe that relationships meant people-pleasing—giving more, doing more, and trying to be everything for everyone. Now, I understand that healthy relationships are about energy, not exhaustion. It’s about how you feel when someone is around you. It’s not about quantity, but quality. I’ve learned that not everyone deserves your full energy, and that every relationship requires healthy boundaries. There isn’t just one “best friend,” but many meaningful circles we can invest in. For me, the foundation of all relationships now rests on honesty, respect, and forgiveness. And most importantly, relationships grow through intentional acts of love.




2. Gratitude as a Way of Life

According to Robert Emmons and McCullough (2003), gratitude shifts our focus from what’s missing to what’s present—and this truth has truly changed my life. Gratitude for me is not just a thought, but a way of living. It begins with my morning prayers and continues with family thanksgiving at night. It shows up in writing thank-you notes, sending appreciation messages, and journaling blessings. It is not simply saying “I’m thankful,” but pausing long enough to feel it purely. As a leader, I hear challenges every day, but I’ve trained myself to accept, act, learn, and then be grateful. Over time, gratitude is no longer something I practice—it has become part of who I am.




3. Staying Active (Body & Mind)

The Harvard Medical School highlights how movement improves both mental and emotional well-being. During the pandemic, we realized something simple yet powerful—we may not control everything around us, but we can always choose to move. And movement changes everything. It releases endorphins, clears the mind, and strengthens the body. I’ve come to believe truly that health is the foundation of wealth. Because how we feel physically shapes how we think emotionally, and ultimately, how we experience life.

4. Creating a Positive Environment

Our environment quietly shapes our happiness. I’ve learned to be intentional about the space I live in—welcoming natural light, keeping things clean and organized, surrounding myself with plants and living things, and creating areas for peace and reflection. A home filled with warmth and love makes a difference in ways we don’t always notice. When your environment is calm, your mind becomes calm, you become more familiar to calm.... and happiness becomes easier to feel and sustain.



5. Living with Purpose

From Dan Buettner and Blue Zones research, we learn that purpose gives life direction and is closely tied to longevity. This understanding has changed how I approach each day. I no longer just wake up—I wake up for something. Purpose gives meaning to everything: work, family, service, and even struggles. When you know your “why,” life becomes something you intentionally live, not something you simply go through. It gives you a reason to keep showing up, growing, and giving.




6. Acts of Kindness

According to Sonja Lyubomirsky (2005), helping others increases happiness, strengthens connection, and deepens meaning. For me, kindness is where happiness multiplies. It’s found in serving in church, joining communities, quietly supporting others, and simply showing up when someone needs you. I’ve realized that the more you serve, the more you understand life, and the more you feel connected—not just to people, but to God. Kindness allows us to experience something greater than ourselves, and in doing so, it fills us in ways nothing else can.

7. Living Mindfully

Jon Kabat-Zinn (1994) teaches that being present reduces stress and increases satisfaction. This is one of the most challenging yet most powerful lessons I’ve learned. When you are truly present, you stop overthinking, you begin to appreciate simple moments, and you experience life more fully. You start to notice the laughter, the quiet, and the beauty in ordinary days. And in those moments, you realize that life has always been full—you just needed to be present enough to see it. Let's take time to celebrate each day!





Happiness, Now

Now, happiness feels different—quieter than before,
yet deeper than I ever knew.

It is no longer something I chase, no longer something I wait for.
It is something I choose— again and again,
every single day.

I find it in the people I love, in the gentle presence of God,
in small chances to do good, in the unnoticed beauty of ordinary moments.

I’ve learned that happiness does not live only in perfect days.
It also lives in the refining, in the becoming.

Happiness, after all, is a daily creation.